As I wind down my final preparation for the Chicago Marathon, DebRuns picks a word that sums up my feelings about running: Passion. A lot of people associate the word passion with love. What's it like to have a passion for an activity?
I talk a lot about running, both here on the blog and in real life.
When I was a child, I ran but it was never for fitness. It was part of play or just to get somewhere in a hurry. I lived in the country and my sisters and I ran through the fields that lie between our home and our cousins' homes. We ran through the woods behind my grandparents' farm.
But running to run? Oh no. I didn't "like" to run. And when I was in high school, running wasn't yet "a thing".
Fast forward to life as an adult. Overwhelmed with responsibility and ill-equipped to cope with the stress of being a "grownup", I rediscovered running to help me focus and burn off some of that negative energy. I began to love running. Running helped me quiet those voices in my head that told me I wasn't enough. I was able to tackle those previously difficult life tasks that in the past would have made me anxious.
I made sure to schedule running in my life at least every other day. Some called it an obsession. I disagreed. The more I found solace in the run, the more my passion for running continued to grow.
I also found that I had some skills as a runner. While I wasn't super fast, I could hold my own as a middle of the pack runner. Rediscovering my passion for running gave me a huge sense of pride. Now at an age where I should be slowing down, I still like to chase down a goal. Less competition in my age group and some finish line success has reignited that passion for running fast. For this upcoming marathon, I set a huge goal for myself.
I'll freely admit that this marathon training cycle has really tested my passion for running. Training has been hard. I'm tired and feeling a little burnt out. I don't like feeling this way. At this point in my training, running feels more like a chore. So I've scaled back my marathon goal a bit. While I'd love to finish sub-4 and achieve a BQ, I'm ok now with just having fun and finishing strong.
Although everyone tells me it's normal to feel this way at this point in training, I know that my motivation has to come from inside me. I'm hoping that the adrenaline will flow at the starting line and ignite that passion within me.
Have you ever felt burnt out before a big event? What do you do to get yourself motivated when you're just not feeling it?
The title for this post comes from one of my favorite songs by one of my favorite bands of all time, R.E.M.
"Not everyone can carry the weight of the world...."
Check out the Wednesday Word link up at DebRuns!