Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Runners, We Get Each Other

The best thing about writing this blog, and the reason I started it, is to reach other runners. The idea was to connect with people who understand me. Instead of telling me I'm obsessed, you all encourage me. When I'm hurt, you feel me. Training? You advise me. Mishaps? Runfessions? Chafing? Runners' trots? You get me.

You are my people.

My family doesn't want to hear about it. My friends pretend to want to hear it. They all politely ask me about running. It's like waving a steak under a dog's nose. I'm so eager, so excited, so passionate about my running that I can hardly hold it in. I vomit up a dialogue of my past runs and then...

Their eyes glaze over. 

Taking the Long Way Home


Growing up with a father who was and still is an old car buff, I should understand this well. While my passion is for miles on my feet and his for miles on the road, my dad and I have that common love for our thing. His thing is not my thing, and when we go to his house and are paraded out to the garage to see his latest car, yep, after the initial admiration and he starts talking shop, we all glaze over. 

Don't get me wrong. His cars are spectacular, and I couldn't be more proud of him. I have to laugh--every time he shows us his latest acquisition, which is often a rusty metal car frame and boxes of parts, we shake our heads. Months later, he has assembled a spectacular, show-worthy vehicle.

Isn't this much like training for a marathon? We sign up for a race and put in months of training. Cross the finish line and receive a medal. Often, our family and friends are there to cheer us on, to support us.

Over the years of dad's car talk, my mom was a good sport. She went to car shows with my dad and sat by his side while he talked with his people. I know it's not her thing. As a child, I went to a few shows. But it just wasn't my thing either. Talking 4 door or 2 door or suicide doors, 4 on the floor or on the shaft, Woody and Merc, Original vs Reproduction. You catch my drift.

Taking the Long Way Home

I think that's why, with regards to races, I let my husband off the hook. He supports me but the memories of how I felt, being dragged to those car shows as a kid, made me sensitive to his reluctance. I was ok with it. But I won't lie. I didn't like being at races alone. Once I started the blog I was able to connect with other like-minded runners. 

It's fun being part of a group where we can talk running. A group where we don't have to explain how far our last marathon was. To be part of a circle of friends who understand portapotties and GU. Splits and fartleks. Bandits and bling. LSDs and hitting the wall. DNF and DNS. AG, BQ, and PR. PF and ITB. Meb and Shalane. And only a runner can understand the goal of beating Oprah. We need a new acronym for that. BO? As in, at my 2d Chicago marathon, I ran 4:17, which was a PR and a BO?

Taking the Long Way Home

Let's all rejoice in our passion and savor being part of this esoteric group. Unite! We are all runners. Whether it's 5ks or 50ks. Or no runs at all. We need each other. We all get each other.

Does your family get you? Or do they glaze over when you start talking about running? Have you had a BO?

I'm linking up with Deb Runs for Wednesday Word, which happens to be esoteric! Not a word I use. Ever. But I'm so proud to be a part of this esoteric, wonderful running group! I'm also linking up with Debbie, Rachel, Susie, and Lora for Coaches Corner!








74 comments :

  1. This is precisely what I am living now when it comes to yoga.
    I know I'm going through and evangelical face :-) but I just can't stop. Yet. Thank goodness for my tribe of women in the neighborhood and at my studio!!

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  2. total agreement! I don't think I've ever heard the word esoteric...until this week LOL

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    1. It's certainly not a word I've used before! But what a great word to describe our little niche.

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  3. I'm pretty sure I haven't had a BO (unless maybe the OTHER kind of BO).

    Because I started running when I moved here, all my friends here are runners! At least my closest friends.

    Mr. Judy still has to listen to a lot of running talk, but I figure that's ok, cause I have to listen to talk about his job or the traffic. I've tried to tell him that people really aren't interested in hearing about other people's traffic woes (hint, hint), but he continues to regale me. We are very different people, with very different interests, and we think very differently, too.

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    1. I talk about traffic all the time. That also makes my family glaze over!

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  4. I really don't talk about running a lot. When I get home from a run, Paul will say "how was your run?" and I'll maybe tell him two sentences... unless shit went DOWN! But normally it doesn't. I'll talk about a race with my family, but lucky for them, I don't race a lot!

    My eyes glaze over when Paul talks about football. I try to act interested but it is hard!

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    1. My husband and son talk football all the time! I politely ask about their fantasy teams...

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    2. Omg me too!!! Yahoo actually capped Paul off from having too many fantasy leagues!

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  5. Well said! We are a great group who just gets each other. It's fabulous when you find your peeps

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  6. I don't talk about racing with my family for this exact reason, the glazed over eyes! Because I always get the "Another race? You just ran a race!" Even from Roger, who runs with me. But this is why I love my running group and the blogs that I read, because I can go all running lingo on you!! and there is lots of support from this group. I truly enjoy being part of this blogging community.

    No BO for me yet, but I will happen. I hope.

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    1. I've had 2 BOs. What a dubious accomplishment!

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  7. My family was so indifferent to the last race I did, while they were at the finish, they made no effort to actually see me cross the finish line and I ended up wandering around for about 10 minutes looking for them. Maybe I wouldn't have cared but it was the first race I'd done in 6 years! Not gonna lie, it kind of hurt my feelings, and I decided right then and there that's the very last time I'm asking for support.

    I don't think I'll ever BO as right now, I don't have plans to train for another marathon.

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    1. My family came to my first Chicago Marathon and I felt like I spent more time looking for them then I did enjoying the race. I also missed my husband and sons near the finish line--I felt really bad about that. It took me way longer to run than I had expected and I hated that they stood there all that time waiting for me. I appreciated their support, but it was much easier to run #2 without worrying about them looking for me.

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  8. Some of my family get it and others feel like I'm talking a whole different language.

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    1. Your lucky that any of them get it! Mine just change the subject...

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  9. We definitely think alike!!

    Several years ago when I ran a half with a friend, she wanted a BSP. (Beat Sarah Palin). She had a PR but was disappointed that she didn't BSP.

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  10. And I did BO for the half marathon - She finished in 2:16.

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  11. I got into running because of my parents. My dad's always run, and he found Run Disney. Then that motivated my mom, and a few years later, it motivated me. I get excited when I meet another runner because we can talk shop. I keep it bottled up outside of my blog, and I'm itching to talk to other runners.

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    1. So that's nice that you can talk with your parents about running!

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  12. My fitness journey has been my own, and my family isn't really into it for the most part. So I don't really talk to them much about it, but I think at least I'm setting a good example for them if nothing else. I'm glad to have social media and other bloggers to be able to talk about all things fitness related, for sure! :)

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  13. I absolutely get you! I think that's what I love most about the running community: just how wonderful and encouraging we are of one another. Granted, there are definitely some grumpy elitist apples, but overall it's a welcoming and supportive. You keep talking about it and we'll keep listening and getting you :)

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    1. I've had 99.9% positive interactions with other runners, so when I meet a bad apple it's such a surprise!

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  14. Total glaze over with the family. They nod like little the little puppy dogs on dash boards. Just like I do when my hubs talks about golf (nod...nod...nod). Gosh, I NEED a BO!

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    1. Now I have this visual of my family bobbleheading up and down! LOL!

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  15. Cracking up at BO!!!! If I ever ran a marathon that would surely be my goal!!!

    I mean what else are we suppose to talk about right!!??!!

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  16. I love the BO acronym--genius! I do love to talk about running and that is why I try to be interactive on the blogs I subscribe too! I talk to Rick about it and I am sure he gets super bored listening about my running, swimming, cycling, lifting...blah, blah, blah but he's too sweet to ever say anything. And honestly, when he talks about golf or skiing or his Harley I get excited for him simply because I know the feeling..even though besides riding on the back of his bike, I could really care less about those sports. I am glad we can find our people whether it be in person or online! It feels really nice when others "get you".

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    1. I started out interacting with bloggers for about a year or so before I started my own. When I started reading them, I realized that I found my people. It was a great feeling!

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  17. I GET YOU!!! And I totally feel you about eyes glazing over. I so want my family to love what I do but you're right, it's not their thing.

    And I still haven't BO'ed. What's up with that?! Pfffffft.

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  18. Wasn't there an age spot cream way back in the dark ages called Esoteri...something??
    Yes to the BO! At my PR marathon I ran with the Beat Will Farrell pace group. And we did! BWF!

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    1. That's hilarious, the BWF! This could be a whole new thing for us! Beat Katie Holmes...Sarah Palin...Oprah..Will Farrell. Who else?

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  19. Yes, we are part of a very supportive esoteric group! I'm around so many runners every day, though, that it doesn't seem so esoteric to me, but you're right, we do make up a small part of the populations - especially as marathoners!

    Thanks for linking up!

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    1. I'm not around a lot of runners, so this means a lot to me!

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  20. Love this post!! Right now, my entire world revolves and every single thought I have revolves around NYC marathon this Sunday. I have not had a BO, as my LA marathon time was 4:36. I'd love to BO at NYC this Sunday, but it's a harder course than LA, so I'm not going to be disappointed if I don't. I'm going to try my best to enjoy it. But, I would LOVE to BO at NYC!!! Cross your fingers for me.

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    1. Sending a BO your way!

      That just sounds wrong tho.... :p

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  21. My husband gets me because he's races on his bike. (His recaps are even longer than mine!) I quit trying to talk about it to the rest of my family. The running/blogging community is great!

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    1. I've met THE BEST folks through this blog. That is all.

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  22. I was a horse person before, I'm a runner now--I like my tribes of individuals who speak the same language!
    And then there is the Crohn's.... another special tribe, lol

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    1. I have some IBS peeps too..altho that is a club no one wants to be a part of...

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  23. YEAHHHH so true. I always ask Andrew how work is going but MAN IS IT SO BORING TO LISTEN TO. But love happens when we're uncomfortable. I feel so loved when he shows interest in my running and writing because I know how lame he thinks it is. But... that's love! Yay. Group hug.

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    1. Isn't that the truth? My husband doesn't always show interest in my running, but he'll show up at the random race and it means a ton! And he was just amazing at Big Sur.

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  24. Haha! Love this, especially the BO :-) When I did the Marine Corps Marathon, they had several hand madesigns in the park around mile 13 with different celebrity times. It was fun & a good distraction to see who's times I was going to beat!! I BO'd that day :-)

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    1. Getting a BO at MCM would be the ultimate reward!

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  25. Exactly why I love the running community and all of my running buddies. Runners just get it and they understand a certain level of crazy, lol

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  26. I once beat Will Ferrell at a half marathon so....hehe

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  27. <3 Since my husband stopped running, I've felt kind of alone in my sport. I know he supports me, but he doesn't understand why I cry over a particularly stressful training run, or listen too hard to details of a race. I am incredibly grateful for this community and all the wonderful people in it, who are happy to listen and to share.

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    1. I'm pretty sure if my husband ran, he still wouldn't get it if I was upset about a run or a race!

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  28. You're so awesome you BO even if you DNR. That is whats so awesome about the running community all the inclusiveness and camaraderie. My son gets me, he likes to workout. My husband glazes over. I can totally relate! Great Post!

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  29. I just met a neighbor for the first time and his wife introduced him as "the runner." You could see our eyes light up! We talked for at least 45 minutes and our spouses were so happy we weren't talking to them :-)

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  30. So true! I always feel bad when I start talking to non-runners about running because I REALLY get into it. My boyfriend runs so he gets it, but he thinks I'm crazy. My family is very supportive of my running thank goodness!

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    1. I know that feeling well! I try so hard to control my enthusiasm.

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  31. Ha ha ha, so true !
    I was talking about my marathon today at the photocopier and someone says, "how far is that ? 10K"..... ugh, no.

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  32. What a fabulous word to describe this little running blog world!

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  33. lol no one gets it except for my mom (who runs with me). Legit no friends or family who run or understand lol. So I totally feel you! that is why I got started with the blogging world!

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  34. Great post and very well articulated. The running community is such a welcoming place. We are all bound together by a common passion. It is hard to feign interest in things that you simply don't care for like cars- or even sports like football. It's great you have built such a fantastic place (your blog) to connect with other like-minded people who cheer for you.

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    1. I feel lucky to have connected with so many other runners!

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  35. I love the BO acronym!!! I don't talk in depth to my family about it because they don't get it. But sometimes they do ask my about runs and my marathon experiences.

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    1. Mine too. I just have to be careful not to get carried away!

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  36. Holy hell yes! My poor hubs always says I can remember something about running from 20 years ago, but I can't remember a darn thing he told me 5 minutes ago. Yet he gets up early, drives me to every race, and even occasionally joins me in the random 5k. He drives around looking for me on my LSD's to bring me cold water, and wants me to check in to make sure I'm okay when I've been gone a while. He's my crew chief, and I couldn't do a single race without his support. But that glazed look when I bring up the dreaded R word? Oh. Yes. The man should be sainted. For real.

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