Book Review: It Was Me All Along by Andie Mitchell

Andie Mitchell's story is like so many of ours...growing up in a dysfunctional home, an alcoholic father, an enabling mother. Those are the experiences that molded and shaped so many of us. Some kids come through a turbulent childhood relatively unscathed. Some kids develop behavior issues or turn to substance abuse. But Andie Mitchell chose solace in food. Even as a young girl, she was overweight. She experienced ridicule and had poor self-esteem. In her memoir, It Was Me All Along, Mitchell shares her tumultuous childhood and her journey to the realization that she needed to change her lifestyle.

The book starts out with an amazing description of cake. Not just any cake, but Sour Cream Fudge Cake. The description of this cake makes you realize how much more food was to her than just nutrition. Food was like a drug for her, just like alcohol was for her father.

"I can remember carving the first slice, taking the first forkful. The rush of whipped sugar speeding through my bloodstream. It felt like teetering on the ledge of the roof of a skyscraper, exhilarating and terrifying..."

And then she ate the whole thing.

"What begins as hating the cake for all its multiple layers of lucious temptation spirals quickly into hating myself and all my fat cells. I let myself down. I lament not having more control..." 

It was a turning point. After many failed attempts to lose weight, after deciding to accept herself as the "fat girl", Andie made the decision to save her life. And lost 138 pounds while doing it. She also learned more about herself. I particularly enjoyed her comparison of losing weight to running a race. A long slow race. A marathon, in fact...

"Because for once, I realized that weight loss wouldn't be like taking up jogging as a new hobby...it would be like running a marathon, where miles ten through twenty-six just purely, uncompromisingly suck." 

She picked the perfect metaphor. And as she says in the book, once she realized this, she knew that this was going to take "real strength". But she stuck with it, and hit her goal of 133 pounds. Amazing, right?

Not so much. As it turns out, losing the weight was the easy part. Learning to live as a thin person was a much bigger challenge. To me, this was the most interesting part of Andie's story.

I've had friends who lost weight told me they still saw themselves as "fat". This is what Andie describes in the book. She describes the mixed feelings she had about being thin and being praised for that as if she was less worthy when she was an overweight person. It was interesting to me, as a thin person, to read this perspective. Because I hate being called skinny. I don't find it to be complimentary, and it bothers me that people comment on my body. You'd never go up to an overweight person and say, "oh you're so fat!" Right? Andie experienced life on both sides, and learned that being thin was not all it was cracked up to be. Plus she feared gaining weight. She also missed the reckless abandon that comes with not caring about your weight.

The rest of the book chronicles her recovery from food addiction and learning how to eat healthily. I was really impressed with her journey. Andie's story really helped me understand why people who lose weight cannot keep the weight off. There is so much more to dieting than calorie restriction. Learning to love yourself, for one. The person you were before, and the person you've become. And as Andie says:

"....fat or thin, it was me all along."

Today Andie is a food writer and blogger. You can read her blog: Can You Stay for Dinner. She also has a cookbook coming out March 29 called Eating in the Middle: A Mostly Wholesome Cookbook.

Have you struggled with weight loss and learning how to live as a thin person? Do you eat to live or live to eat? How do you find a middle ground between eating for pleasure and eating for fuel? What recipe holds a special place in your heart or provokes a happy memory for you?

Here's the link up badge! You can find the link up at the end of the post. The link up stays live for 2 weeks, but the comments stay live forever! Don't forget to link back to this post, and please read and comment on the other reviews. Remember, sharing is caring! I'm so grateful to all of you who participate in the book club!

Next month we are reading what I've been told is an amazingly inspirational book! Find A Way by Diana Nyad is the story of her swim across the Florida Straits from Key West to Cuba. I cannot wait to pick this one up! The review and link up will be posted on the 3rd Friday of March (March 18). Let me know if you have any questions!

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5 new things to love on the run!

It's the month of love, right? I've been trying out some new fitness related items! Besides the SLS3 Dual Pocket Run Belt that I'm reviewing and giving away below, what else am I loving on the run? Or the bike....or the mat?

For inspiration: 
For Christmas, my sister gave me a Momentum wrist wrap with the mantra "just breathe" written on it. I'm sure she had no idea that so far this year I would need frequent reminders to do just that. I wear that bracelet every day and am grateful for the prompting. I just love it. My friend Zenaida hosted a giveaway on her blog, and I won a Momentum wrap from her! That one reads "stronger than yesterday". Sometimes I wear both. I need all the reminders I can get to stay tough! Since you can customize the mantras, you can make the wrap all your own. I had one made for my coach Becky with her favorite mantra "good vibes only". I can't believe she didn't already have one. I also ordered a wrap for one of my little patients who just finished a year and a half of chemo and radiation. Hers says "you are your own superhero". She is my superhero.

photo courtesy of Momentum designs

For fun!
One of my readers, Barbara Valentin, reached out to me about the book club. She's an author of contemporary romance novels and wanted to know if I would be interested in reading her book, False Start (affiliate link). The story is about a newspaper reporter who gets assigned to train for and run the Chicago Marathon. The catch is that she has to work with a coach, who just happens to be her ex fiance's brother. While this isn't the book genre we read for the book club, the book sounded like it would be a fun read. Valentin offered to send me a copy for my kindle, free of charge. Valentin is a great storyteller, and this light entertaining read would be enjoyable for anyone looking for something fun to read. Plus it's about running, and that's a win!

affiliate link

For the bike:

So it's no secret that I've been spending time on the bike trainer. I really enjoy this form of cross training. But how to track my speed, my cadence, and my miles when I'm not moving forward? I did my homework, and instead of buying a bike computer, I bought the Wahoo Blue SC Speed and Cadence sensor. (affiliate link) This device works via bluetooth with my iPhone. It's compatible with Android as well. I downloaded the Wahoo fitness app, but you can use it with a variety of fitness apps. Being a numbers person, it's been fun tracking my rides. I'm looking forward to the warm weather rides and road testing it.

affiliate link

But wait...how do I use my iPhone on the bike? Have no fear, there are plenty of handlebar mounts out there. Again, I did my homework and chose the Koomus Bike2Go Universal Smartphone Bike Mount Holder Cradle (affiliate link) (KB2GUSBMHC for short). I had my son install it for me, which he did in no time flat. I love it. The cradle is adjustable and holds a variety of phones. You can also adjust the tilt. There's a tether that inserts into your headphone jack in case the phone slips out of the mount. I've only used the KB2GUSBMHC on the trainer, so I'll fill you in on it's performance once I'm back on the road.

affiliate link

For the run:
Ok, now to that SLS3 Dual Pocket Run Belt. I knew that when SLS3 asked me to review it that I was already going to like it. Double Pockets? Yes, please. Waterproof? Yes, please. You know I love my SpiBelt. But even though it stretches, it doesn't hold everything I need. Plus I hate having everything all in one pocket. I'm always afraid I'm going to drop something and lose it.  The SLS3 Dual Pocket Run Belt solves that problem for me. Now I have a pocket for my phone and one for everything else. The pockets are large enough to hold my iPhone6. The waterproof material is a plus since I run outside no matter what the weather. It comes in a variety of colors. The belt is wide, adjustable, and comfortable. The only problem I had was since I like to wear the belt low around my hips, it would tend to slide up and I had to keep adjusting it. Other than that, I really can't recommend this belt enough. I'll be taking it out for a long run this weekend, so we'll see how it really performs!

you know that's not me!
photos courtesy of SLS3 and Amazon.com

What running/fitness gadgets are you loving lately? Any running related books you want to recommend?

Book review: Fast Girl: Running From Madness by Suzy Favor Hamilton

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right?

Apparently not for Suzy Favor Hamilton. She made a name for herself as an Olympian....and as a high paid escort. She was apparently so skilled as an escort that she even ranked #2 on an escort website at one point in time. Go big or go home. While she was touring for Run Disney and the Rock and Roll Race series, she also made arrangements to meet clients on the side. On the down low. Multitasking. Getting the most bang for her buck.

Bad pun, I know.

She didn't just meet clients in Vegas. But Vegas is where most of the action happened.

I don't know who to be more disgusted with--Suzy or her husband. This book left me speechless.

Ok, I'll back it on up. Suzy Favor Hamilton was a top middle distance runner in the 1990s, competing in 3 Summer Olympics. In her final event, she saw she wasn't going to win and faked an injury, falling to the track. She readily admits this.

Yep, she threw the race because she wasn't going to win. Just try and get your head around that one.

After retiring from competition and settling into life in Wisconsin as a partner in her husband's real estate business, Suzy was unsatisfied. Diagnosed with depression, she started taking an antidepressant. For her and Mark's 20th wedding anniversary, she suggested a trip to Las Vegas. The trip included skydiving and a threesome with an escort, both at Suzy's suggestion. She felt a rush from the experience with the escort and suggested to her husband that becoming an escort was something she'd like to try.

And he agreed? My head almost blew off when I read that part.

Suzy blames her promiscuity on bipolar disorder, which she says resulted from the antidepressant she was prescribed. Interestingly, a major side effect of SSRIs is a suppressed libido. Not in this case, it seems.

All Suzy's trips to Las Vegas were made with the knowledge of her husband Mark. I can understand that bipolar disorder leads to acting out in all sorts of ways--excessive spending, drinking and drugs, and sexual promiscuity, but instead of helping Suzy, according to her story, her husband allowed her do just what she wanted. She says he didn't approve, but he knew and he stuck around.

Does this seem odd to you?

Can you say enabler?

Or is Suzy looking for someone to blame?

Clearly she was out of control. I read most of this book with my mouth hanging open. And it's not a well written book but it is a page turner. First I had to try to fathom her husband's complicity. Right now, my husband is trying to wrap his head around my 2 spring races which involve plane tickets and hotel stays. Trips to Las Vegas to have sex with other men? For money? I believe that he might draw the line at that. Although I don't know for sure. I've never tested him on that.

What kind of husband would go along with this?

In the book, Suzy talks about being afraid of failure. First as a runner, and then as a prostitute. On her prostitution journey, her ego got the best of her and she became careless with her clients, who eventually figured out who she was. It was finally a reporter with The Smoking Gun who outed her. On the day the story went public, Suzy convinced her husband to go hiking. While they were driving, she tried to throw herself out of the car. Finally, her husband drew the line, and she got some help.

It takes a lot to get Suzy's husband to stand up to her. I probably should cut him some slack. But this story is just so hard for me to believe on so many levels. There's so much drama and so much blaming of everyone around her, as well as blaming everything on the bipolar disorder. I never felt that she had any regrets or took any responsibility for her behavior.

Initially, I found Hamilton's book to be dragged down by superfluous detail. But as the story moves forward, the storytelling improves, and I found it hard to put the book down. It was like reading a tabloid story or watching a car wreck. You know nothing good is going to come out of this story, right?

Personally, I was disappointed that there was so much detail and glorification of her sexual conquests. Clearly, she was proud of her prowess. She talked about how she wanted to be the top escort in the world.

I would have liked more detail about her life as a collegiate and Olympic athlete. She had so much talent and tons of opportunities with companies that wanted to sponsor her, based on her reputation as a runner. But that's not what this book is about. I will admit that it was fascinating to read about someone who had it all but was so willing to live life on the edge.

Maybe she was so out of control because no one around her threw out a safety net. Everyone just let her do her own thing. It seems like she had so much power over all the people in her life. The whole time I read this book, I kept asking myself why no one tried to intervene.

I should cut Suzy some slack because of her illness. There's probably plenty of blame to go around besides her husband. Her parents who pushed her? The University of Wisconsin for putting her in those easy classes that all the athletes pass? The coach who told her that her breasts were too big for a runner? Her competitors who were possibly doping? Her sponsors? Her doctors? Her pimp?

In the end though, she comes back to the realization that she still has running. After reading this book, I'm not entirely convinced.

"I run now for the freedom it gives me. I run because it feels good. I run because it is good for me--for my heart and for my head. But it isn't all I do. I am still constantly in motion: in my running shoes, on my bike, on my yoga mat, exercise is my drug of choice now....

...In these moments, on the path with my feet hitting the ground, I feel peaceful. I am myself, living the life I want, not the one that others expect from me or the one that I created out of fantasy and confusion. My life now isn't perfect. Far from it. But it is a life of contentment, and for this I am incredibly grateful. "

Life goes on, and now Suzy has become a yoga instructor. She also has said she's decided to devote more time to being a better mother to her young daughter.

I hope so.

I didn't attempt to contact Suzy Favor Hamilton for an interview because there are so many stories about her on the internet, as well as some live interviews. She was featured in Sports Illustrated and People Magazine as well as on 20/20. All these stories are readily available.

Did you read the book? A lot of people told me that after seeing Suzy on the news that they had no desire to read her story. I'm curious about what you think. If you don't have a blog post to link up, feel free to post in the comments. Be sure to check out the other reviews. 

Here's the link badge! Link up is at the end of the post. It will be live for 2 weeks, so if you haven't read the book, you've got plenty of time! It's a quick read. Be sure to link back to this post! Remember sharing is caring.

Next month we're shifting gears and reading It was Me All Along by Andi Mitchell. This sweet memoir was written by a young woman who struggles with body image issues and weight loss. It has received great reviews. Should be another good one! Book review and link up will go live on Friday, February 19.

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Taking the Long Way Home Book Club Book Review: 4:09:43 Boston Through the Eyes of the Runners by Hal Higdon

"These were moments when their lives, or the lives of all people through the world, changed. December 7, 1941: when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. November 22, 1963; when Lee Harvey Oswald assassinated President John F. Kennedy. January 28, 1986: when the space shuttle Challenger carrying Teacher-in-Space Christa McAuliffe exploded. September 11, 2001: when planes crashed into the World Trade Center taking both towers down and killing 3,000 people". -from 4:09:43 Boston Through the Eyes of the Runners.

 Where were you on 4/15/2013 when the bombs went off at the finish line of the Boston Marathon?

I was at work. I remember it clearly. It was the middle of the afternoon, and I had just finished seeing a patient and came out of a room, when my medical assistant told me that there was a story that a bomb went off at a marathon. It was a Monday in April, and I didn't know of any other marathons that day except Boston. I checked the internet and saw the breaking news. I was stunned and I finished my clinic in a daze.

As time passed and we learned more, the gravity of the situation continued to hit me. I couldn't help but personalize it. When I ran Chicago for the first time, in 2011, my family, including my husband and boys, my mom and one of my sisters and her family were all at mile 26, cheering me on. What if?

What if, indeed? For the next couple of days, my Facebook feed exploded with stories and updates. Several bloggers that I follow shared their take on the events. Some of them were at the race. I became almost obsessed with the story. And I've never run Boston.

In his book, 4:09:43 Boston Through the Eyes of the Runners, veteran marathoner, coach, and author Hal Higdon culls the stories of bloggers and Facebookers, and presents those stories to tell the story of the Boston Marathon bombings. He learned about the bombings while he was at his home in Indiana, and like so many of us, watched the story explode via social media.

And as one of the runners profiled in the book, Diane DeStefano, so poignantly puts it:

"the Boston Marathon is the Holy Grail of Running. Some people spend years trying to achieve their Boston Qualifying time. Then, once you qualify, you spend months training in cold weather, paying careful attention to do the specific workouts that will help you attack the tough miles the come towards the end of the marathon".

Amby Burfoot, crossing the iconic finish line in first place many years ago

Higdon features the stories of 75 runners throughout the book. In a chapter titled Diaspora, veteran marathoner Amby Burfoot shares his reaction. Burfoot has run Boston over 20 times, winning the race in 1968. At this Boston marathon, he was running to celebrate his 45th anniversary of the victory. Running in the 3rd wave of runners, he was stopped less than a mile from the finish. His first thought?

"Who's ruining my party?"

Then, like so many of the other runners who were stopped from finishing the race, he learned why the race was over, he started feeling guilty for having those thoughts.

Higdon calls the period of time immediately after the bombings the runners' "diaspora". Diaspora was a new word for me, and basically it means, "to scatter about". The word is used to describe a large migration of people from one place to another. When the runners were told the race was over, that is exactly what happened. They began wandering, with no place to go. No one knew what was going on, said Erica Greene, who was at mile 19 when the race was stopped.

2014! Boston is back!

For me, a runner who is considered "middle of the pack", the story of the bombings hit hard. The runners affected most by the bombing were the middle of the packers, and I couldn't help but think about "what if?". Janeen Bergstrom was at mile 25.85 when the bombs went off.

"Everyone would tell me later that I finished, because I was so close, but a marathon is 26.2 miles, not 25.85 miles."

and

"Everything you do is for that moment, the moment of stepping on the mat. But the lack of accomplishment and the emptiness I feel is compounded by guilt."

There's something about crossing that finish line. I'd feel mad, and guilty, and sad all at once. I would. Because that's how we runners roll.

Overall, Higdon does an excellent job sharing the runners' stories and coordinating them along a timeline of events. As a runner, I really enjoyed hearing the runners' perspective of the events as opposed to what I read in the news. This is a quick read, and one that will stay with you long after you finish the book. The runners' stories really made this book relatable to me. Every time I cross the starting line of a race now I am so grateful for our freedom and that we can continue to enjoy events like a race. Last year, as I joyfully ran the Chicago marathon, I scanned the crowds that lined the entire 26.2 miles of the route. There was so much goodwill and happiness everywhere I looked. For the life of me, I just don't understand the thoughts of those that want to harm us, simply because we want to enjoy ourselves.

As Amby Burfoot said:

"This was not just an attack against the Boston Marathon. It was an attack against the American public and our democratic use of the streets. We use our public roadways for annual parades, protest marches, presidential inaugurations, and yes, marathons. We cannot cover our eyes and ears and pretend violent acts do not threaten our great institutions. Our institutions did not become great by following a path of timidity and cowardice. We can only hope that the Boston Marathon, though pummeled, will rise again stronger than before. "

I believe that it has!

I also did some background reading after I finished Higdon's book, reading Long Mile Home by Scott Helman and Jenna Russell. This book was less personal and more fact based than Higdon's and focused more on the actual events than the stories of the individual runners. But one of the statements that stood out to me as I read this interesting book was that in spite of the terror attacks on the race, interest and participation in running continues to grow; in fact road races are selling out at paces. Many of the bigger races have turned to a lottery system for entries. Clearly, people aren't going to let the threat of terrorism stop them from running.

One Fund at boston.com

After the bombings, the Boston Strong campaign was started as a way to raise money for the victims of the bombings. This effort raised millions of dollars, much of it through grassroots endeavors, such as selling t-shirts. I bought a few. It seems that even for non-runners, the attack on Americans, on Patriots Day, who were participating in a sporting event, struck a chord with everyone.

Jury selection. Artwork courtesy of Hal Higdon

In response to the questions I asked Hal Higdon, he also sent me a copy of an article he wrote for the Chicago Tribune, comparing the Tsarnaev brothers to Leopold and Loeb. Higdon was able to attend the jury selection for the trial of Dzhokhar Tsaranaev. And he states:

"Regardless of Judge O'Toole's instructions to prospective jurors about "presumed innocence," no one owning a "Boston Strong" T-shirt has any doubt about Tsarnaev's guilt. His capture was covered live: "Breaking News" on cable TV. Yet if the defense attorneys find even one jurist out of 12 willing to vote against the death penalty, they can match (Clarence )Darrow."

As I publish this blog post, the Boston jury found Dzhokhar Tsaranaev guilty on all 30 counts against him. The sentence has yet to be handed down. Here's what Hal had to say on his Facebook page after the verdict was announced:

"THE JURY HAS SPOKEN: Dzhokhar Tsarnaev has been found guilty of all 30 charges, 17 of which allow the death penalty. The trial now moves into its final sentencing phase during which the jurors, seven women and five men, must decide whether the convicted terrorist gets death or life in prison. That’s the tough call. We all knew going in that Tsarnaev was guilty. The defense attorneys admitted that on Day 1. Now those same attorneys will try to convince at least one of those 12 jurors to show mercy. Why? “His brother made him do it.” Sorry, I’m not buying. But could I vote death, meaning there will be endless appeals for the next dozen years all covered on CNN and the front page of the New York Times? Sure, many would like to see him hauled out into the Mojave desert and beheaded. That’s what ISIS calls justice. Eye for an eye. Do unto them what they unto us. But could you wield that sword and risk making Tsarnaev a martyr, sending him off to the terrorist version of Paradise? In this context, being forced to spend the rest of his life in prison seems the worst we could do for the man who brought so much sorrow into our lives." -Hal Higdon 

Stay tuned. And keep running.

Dzhokhar Tsarnev at the trial. Artwork courtesy of Hal Higdon

After the bombings, I read stories shared by some bloggers, and I've shared the links to those blogs below:

http://organicrunnermom.com/boston-marathon-emotional-healing
http://michellesa.typepad.com/chubsanddante/2013/04/boston-2013.html
http://devonintraining.blogspot.com/2013/04/the-most-difficult-finish-line-to.html
http://www.susanruns.com/2013/04/17/boston-2013-boston-is-for-runnersand-it-always-will-be/
http://blog.runkeeper.com/20/my-journey-to-the-boston-marathon/
https://jackandviv.wordpress.com/2013/04/17/race-report-boston-marathon-2013/
http://www.fairytalesandfitness.com/2013/04/finishing-boston-marathon-2013.html
http://devonintraining.blogspot.com/2013/05/dear-stranger-in-boston.html
http://anothermotherrunner.com/2015/04/14/undonebostonmarathon/

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What did you think? What story stood out to you the most? Where were you when you first heard about the bombings? How did you initially feel? Did the bombings change the way you feel about running road races? Is your preparation for a race any different than before? If you had the opportunity to run this iconic race, would you? Are you? Have you? Share your story! 

Be sure to link your review below! You know the rules...just link back to the original post. The badge is below. Be nice and read the other posts! Sharing is caring after all...and if you don't have a blog, just post your review in the comments. I'm really excited to hear what everyone has to say.

I chose next month's book in honor of Mother's Day. And who better to honor a running mom than the original badass mother runners, Dimity and Sarah! Their new book, Tales From Another Mother Runner is our book of the month for May. I'm hoping with fingers crossed that they'll answer questions, but if they can't, I understand. They're on a book tour after all...

Looking forward to another fun month of book clubbing! Thanks to everyone for your enthusiasm and participation.

Taking the Long Way Home Book Club: Interview with Hal Higdon, author of 4:09:43 Boston Through the Eyes of the Runners

Just in time for the Boston marathon and the book club book review....the interview with the author of this book, Hal Higdon. The legendary runner, who is now 83, was so kind to answer my questions. He also shared some art work with me as well as an article he wrote for the Chicago Tribune on the trial of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. I was thrilled to receive his responses to my questions and I think you'll enjoy the interview. Many of us have used his training plans, available on the internet for free, to train for races. If you weren't a fan before, you will be now. What a nice guy!

And here we go....

Me: Your book focuses on the stories of the runners, and it was so well told. I really enjoyed this perspective. But I’m curious about your take on the bombings.

HH: My take on the tragedy was that it was a horrible event that shot an arrow right into the hearts of those of us who love running, particularly those of us who love and respect the Boston Marathon as the keystone event in our sport. That is somewhat a selfish attitude, but the fear I suspect hits runners is that actions like this could drastically change, if not eliminate, the sport of running 26.2 miles in front of large numbers of vulnerable spectators.

Me: Just like any other important event in history—when Kennedy was shot, when the space shuttle Challenger exploded, when the World Trade Center was attacked—people remember where they were and what they were doing. Where were you and what were you doing when you first learned about the Boston Marathon bombings?

HH: I was home at my computer, doing what I normally do each day, which might include managing what I call my Internet Empire: Facebook, Twitter, the TrainingPeaks bulletin boards. I remember a box popping onto the screen for some reason telling me that a “friend” had just finished: Kate Leahy of Kansas City. (I had coached two of her sisters in high school.) I clicked a button to check Kate’s time, which was somewhere in the low 3-hour range, and was immediately confronted by the fact that bombs had exploded at the finish line of the Boston Marathon. For the rest of that day and for a week or more after, we all were caught up by the fact that “Breaking News” had engulfed our sport.

Me: What was your immediate reaction to the bombings?

HH: Horror. Worry. The fear that people I knew might have gotten hurt or killed. And several friends were, indeed, on Boylston Street when the two bombs hit, one of them probably within a hundred meters of the first explosion. She dropped to the ground fearful that another bomb might explode. The second explosion did occur, although further away. She finally accepted shouted advice and ran as fast as she could away from the finish line and into the “safer” area beyond that line.

Me: There are so many stories about the Boston marathon bombings. Of all the stories you shared in the book, which was your favorite story? Which story was the most difficult for you to share?

HH: Tracy McGuire who lives in Portland and whose husband works for Adidas and was in the grandstands waiting for her to finish. She was approaching the finish line when the first bomb exploded in front of her. Tracy did a quick U-Turn only to have the second bomb also explode in front of her. She hopped a fence and ran through a restaurant to escape, shouting to people at the bar to get out. That was like a “sky is falling” moment, because none of them believed what she was shouting. Eventually they did. And the whole world soon was aware of what happened.

And Michele Keane, who I have known for 10-15 years almost from my beginning days on the Internet. We always call her “One-L.” Michele grew up in Natick right on the border near Wellesley. With her mother, she began handing out water to runners at age 2. She eventually went to Wellesley College, ran Boston a couple of times as a lark, but after graduating got her time down to near 3 hours. If she wasn’t running Boston, she was working the race as a volunteer. She stopped at her old water point to hug her mom, wasted a minute or so, then stopped at Mile 25 to hug her daughter who was a student at Boston University. The daughter told Mom to quit wasting time, to get back on the course. The bombs went off just as she was turning the corner into Boylston.

But there were 25,000 stories that day, each one of them amazing. I only found space to fit 75 of them into the book.

Me: There’s been a lot of changes since Boston. For example, last year when I ran Chicago, there were big snowplows parked at the entrance of the area where the runners entered the corrals. Do you think race directors are doing enough to keep their runners safe?

HH: If another terrorist attack occurs, you can never have done enough. I certainly feel that race directors have compared notes and upped their security, which was always there at races like Chicago, but was not yet intrusive. Flying has become incredibly inconvenient since 9/11, yet the enhanced security didn’t prevent a German pilot from diving a plane into the Alps and killing 150 people. The reality of our sport is that we have a 26.2-mile playing field, and you can’t block access as you can in an airport or at a Chicago Bears football game. We just need to keep our fingers crossed and hope that our insurance is paid up.

halhigdon.com

Me: And on a personal note, you’ve run Boston numerous times. What is your favorite personal memory from the Boston marathon? Your least favorite memory?

HH: Favorite would be 1964 when I got everything right and had the lead through the first two Newton hills before I got passed by several runners who were better than me. I still managed to preserve 5th place, first American, which has provided bragging rights for a half a century. Least favorite would have been Boston five years earlier when I ran with the leaders but failed to make it past 22 miles. At that time I was at the top, or near the top, of the national pyramid, and I couldn’t understand how I could win national championships at 30-K and not keep the pace for a dozen marathons more. This was before we had Runner’s World or halhigdon.com to tell us what we were doing wrong. But as I have often said, if you are afraid to fail, you don’t deserve to win. The highs and lows eventually blend together.

Me: What are you training for? Are you done running long distances? What’s next for you?

HH: I am just finishing work on a book to be titled Hal Higdon’s Half Marathon Handbook. While doing so, I have added a few more miles running to my weekly exercise routine. I just finished the Gate River Run, a 15-K race in Jacksonville, Florida where we spend winters. I have been pointing toward the Indy Mini, the half marathon in Indianapolis. I’m not sure I’m up to a full 13.1 miles, so I might just run a few token miles, enough so I can write about it in my book.

Me: Finally—what advice would you give a runner who wants to qualify for Boston? Is it worth the hype?

HH: Boston definitely is worth the hype. It is the iconic marathon, which is recognized by runners around the world even more than us Yankees, who sometimes don’t recognize Boston’s total majesty. Immediately after the bombings, I quoted a comment by a Talking Head on CNN that Boston was not an “iconic sporting event.” I posted that comment on Facebook to see if my followers agreed. Obviously they did not, but the outrage was even more from runners who lived in the UK or Hungary or Australia. They knew even more than we did the treasure we have each Patriot’s Day, even if that holiday is only celebrated in three states.

You can follow Hal Higdon on his Facebook page or at halhigdon.com. All his training plans are available for free download at his website.

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Did you read the book? Did I hit the high points in this brief interview? Anything you would have asked him? Have you ever used any of Hal's training plans?

Next up....the book review on 4/13. Are you ready? So many books...so little time...

Here's the badge for your blog: Remember, the link up will be live 4/13-4/30. Plenty of time, actually!

Book Review: Honey Do You Need A Ride? Confessions of a Fat Runner by Jennifer Graham

Jennifer Graham is not fat. She calls herself fat, sees herself as fat, wants to own that label, but she's really not "fat". Sorry. I've Googled her and she looks "normal". But that's how she sees herself. And even though she talks a lot about her body image, this book isn't really about being fat. It's about feeling badly about yourself. And employing running as therapy to help you through all the crap life throws at you.

I get that. 100%.

And I have to admit I've been passed in races by lots of runners who are much bigger than me. Size doesn't always matter. We need a word for that. Like how when women pass guys in a race--they're "chicked"? I'll leave that one for the readers to discuss.

Anyways. This book is all about finding yourself through running. Like so many people, Graham first started running to lose weight. She eventually discovered that body size does not make a runner and that exertion becomes joyful:

"It wasn't because of how I felt when I ran; it was because of how I felt afterward. Accomplished. Virtuous. Clean. It's like what Dorothy Parker said about her craft. She said she didn't like writing, but she liked having written. Likewise, when sedentary people first start to run, few enjoy the actual running. The reward comes later. The reward comes from having run." 

Graham is funny, sarcastic, and snarky, and I had some laugh out loud moments when I read this book. I learned that using 2 sports bras to hold the girls in place is called "double bagging". Although when I checked on urban dictionary, that isn't the definition I found. No mention at all of bras. Shame on me for googling it. Guess I should have picked up that box of condoms I found in the road a couple of weeks ago.

Back to the book. Graham talks about her first running clothing and how cotton is not a good fabric to run in. Not because it isn't wicking, but because it outlines your every crevice.  Her description of her zebra striped running outfit took me back to the 90s (I think she must be about my age) and I reminisced about running fashions during that decade. Crinkly pants and jackets? And those thong leotards...you youngsters don't know what you missed out on.

November 1991. Gotta love the high waisted shorts and matching top. That's how we did it back then...

Graham's first massage experience, with a masseuse named "Tommy", was another LOL chapter in the book.  A massage called "the Runner's Revenge"? How could something so wrong feel so right? Made me think of that Seinfeld episode when George got a massage from a guy and he feared that he "felt it move"....

Running with music? She calls it "amateur hour" but says that music makes her feel like she's dancing. But Graham says she'd never use her iPod in a race because if someone yells "look at that ectomorph go", she wants to hear it. Another 90s reference, she talks about running with a Walkman, which she describes as an "Eggo-sized" cassette player. Pre-iPod, I used to train with a Walkman, but I never brought it to a race. Nobody did. I still have mine actually. One of my friends (he's a little eccentric) still runs with his...

She talks about cross training and her attempt at horseback riding. Graham had hoped for tighter glutes and inner thighs.  She got bruises. To keep the horse company, she bought a donkey. She still has the donkey, actually 2 of them. The horses are gone, after the last one tried to kill her. 

Graham with her donkeys. Not sure if these are the escapees that are featured in the book.

Graham is also relatable. She shares her difficulties being married to, and eventually divorced from a non-runner. Relatable moment (for me at least): she never has had the experience of her children cheering her at the finish line of a race or holding a "GO MOMMY GO" sign meant for her. I remember running the Walt Disney World half marathon, and yes, my husband got up with me at 330am to eat breakfast and get me on the monorail. But none of my family were on the course or at the finish line. When I finished I called him and they were already in Epcot, waiting in line for a ride. That stung. They have been at a few races, but reluctantly, and now that I have my own tribe aka running friends, I'm over it. But I certainly understand how Graham felt about that. She talks about meeting another man who was a runner, and who became a "too-good-a-friend". While that hasn't happened to me, I can see how it could. Her husband lacked, as she called it "speed goggles". Personally, I think her ex-husband sounds like a real jerk. Missing races? Sad, but not jerk material. Making fun of her on his talk radio show? Crosses over to a**hole territory. Certainly, that couldn't have helped Graham feel good about herself.

Thankfully, through everything, she had running.

A pervasive theme throughout the book is Graham's relationship with her coaches, Dr George Sheehan, and Pre, as in Steve Prefontaine. Yes, you haven't missed a thing--both men are dead. Prior to signing on with Pre and Dr Sheehan, Graham wrote to Alberto Salazar to see if he would coach her. Seriously. She never heard back from him. When she's running, she hears Pre and Dr Sheehan quotes in her head and those quotes push her through tough runs.  Pre is by her side on the road and through the rough spots in her life. It's kind of funny and sweet how she channels them to get her through tough runs. Pre is always there with the tough love.

Graham channels Pre for this quote during her half. This where she coins the term "runicide".

The book isn't all laughs, though. When Graham talks about her life circumstances, she can be pretty dark. Like a lot of us, she uses humor to help cope with tough times. She struggles with "the reality that...she's done everything right..and still, the outcome has turned out so badly." Reflecting on the suffering of her marriage breaking up, she says she "sees no purpose in any of it--no payoff, no vision..of how this pain could be worth it...". But as she says, "Maybe sometimes going backward is going forward enough...". Graham hurts from the breakup of her marriage, and she writes about it really well. You can feel her pain as you read her essays. Thankfully, even when she's sad, she keeps the reader laughing. I found myself smiling, even as my heart hurt from the pain I felt in her stories.

In the end, she runs her Kiawah Half Marathon. She struggles, and Pre gets her through it. But she is "taunted" by the marathoners who must run the course twice. She thinks she could never run a marathon. She thinks to herself that 13.1 is "mediocre". She'll never put a 13.1 sticker on her car, because she says 13.1 means "I can't run 26.2". She listens to those voices inside her head that tell her she can't. Who hasn't done that? And then, she has an epiphany on a run after the race. She starts to feel joy. Thanks her coaches. And remembers, like we all do on a great run, why it is that we run.

I hope she feels better about her accomplishments. As they say, 13.1 isn't half of anything. Because of the word "half" in the title, the half marathon has an image issue. Maybe they should rename the half marathon. Give it a title worthy of the distance. Me, I look at the half as a gateway drug to the full. Eventually everyone wants to try it.

Oh, and yes, the title of the book? It really happened. Yes, Buick LeSabres are only driven by grandmothers. Lesson learned. Don't stop to talk to people on the run. You never know what they might have to say to you. You might not like it.

So what did you think?

Do you see yourself as a "fat runner"? Does your body image affect how you feel about yourself as a runner?

Does your partner/significant other run? If so, do you train together? If not, is he/she supportive? Do you think a marriage can survive when one person is a runner and the other isn't?

Who or what do you channel to push you through a tough run or race? Do you have a mantra?

What do you think about Graham's statement that a 13.1 bumper sticker means "I can't run 26.2"? Do you put race stickers on your car? If not, why not?

Share your thoughts in the comments below and/or link up your review! Be sure to link back to this blog post. 

And next up, just in time for the Boston marathon is Hal Higdon's 4:09:43 Boston 2013 Through the Eyes of the Runners. The link up will be open 3/14- 3/28/2015. 

Don't forget to grab the linkup logo! 

Book Club: An interview with Jennifer Graham, author of Honey Do You Need a Ride? Confessions of a Fat Runner

In anticipation of our first book club/book review on Saturday, I sent some questions to the author of our first book. I'm hoping to do this with each book. Graham did not disappoint me! Her answers were fresh, honest, and self-deprecating, just like the book. 

Have you read the book? It's not too late....The link up/review will be posted on March 14 and will stay open until March 28, right here on the blog. You don't have to be a blogger to participate. Just post your review in the comments. Of course, the comments will remain open forever! I'm so looking forward to reading everyone's thoughts and comments. Meanwhile, here's some food for thought from Jennifer Graham.

Are you still running?  And what events do you have planned for this year?

Oh, yeah, because I really have no choice in the matter, of course.  In the book I wrote about the line runners cross, after which you know you are never going back to a sedentary life, and at some unknown point I crossed it.  That said, there are periods when I don’t run very much – unhappily, I’ve been in one for a couple of months. (Moved to Pittsburgh in January, and between handling a new job and single motherhood and icy, hilly streets, it’s been rugged.) But even then, I get out at least twice a week, just for my mental health.  And I’ve been in this game long enough that I don’t worry that I will backslide.  No matter how long since you’ve run, you’re only one run away from being a runner again. 

As for events, I am planning to do the Pittsburgh Half-Marathon in May.  Still looking for summer races in my new part of the world – and I’m open to suggestions!

Something we are all still talking about...unless you live in Florida...Have you been running outside this winter? How are you dealing with the weather?   The weather – as in the snow and temperatures – doesn’t bother me, but icy roads and trails do.  I’m terrified of breaking a bone, so I won’t run if there’s even the possibility of black ice.  That said, I do have my tricks.   If the snow is not too deep, I drive to a baseball diamond or football field and run around the field in YakTrax.  I feel safe there, because if I fall, at least I don’t have to worry about falling in the path of an SUV.  And since I just moved into a house with a fairly big backyard, I took a snow shovel and dug myself a backyard track in the snow!  I still use the YakTrax running on it, and have to go slow because footing can be uneven, but I can get in a good 30-minute workout with lots of bracing, fresh air.  (I consider gyms a place of last resort.)

Would you consider running a marathon?   Oh yes, it’s definitely a goal.  I cheered on the sidelines of Boston for eight years, and every single time, wished I was out there. But I respect the distance too much to do it without serious preparation, and as a single, working mom, I have not been able to carve out the time to train.  I hope to in the next decade, God willing and my knees hold up. I would like to run the Kiawah Marathon in South Carolina and (of course) some day qualify for Boston. I am fully aware I may be 90 before I can achieve a BQ though!

Does Pre still run with you?  Dr. Sheehan?  Do they have anything new to say after all these years?     Well, of course!  I am fiercely loyal to my tribe, and they to me.   But they, of course, have work elsewhere, and there are new voices I need to hear, so I like to invite others in ….the great Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius has a lot to say about power and discipline. I highly recommend his "Meditations."

Some readers have taken issue with you calling yourself fat. How do you respond to that? And isn’t it really about how we see ourselves? Has running helped you to see yourself as other than “fat”? Do you still see yourself as a “fat runner”? Yes, I know, and I’m genuinely sorry about that, because I hate to see women tearing each other down under any circumstance, but especially over something like weight, which is an issue that is a source of pain for so many of us.  I think I will probably always “feel” fat because I was overweight as a child, which can be a scar you carry with you for life, particularly if you feel unloved in other ways, too. My weight has fluctuated wildly over the course of my adult life, from 180 or so (I’m guessing, it could have been more – I didn’t own a scale then) before I started running, down to 146 when I got married, up to 226 during my last pregnancy. Right now, I weigh 157, 10 pounds from where I’d like to be. That’s the point at which my thighs don’t rub together and where I “feel” thin and I don't feel (as) embarrassed to be naked.   My inability to get there, despite decades of trying and thousands of miles of running, points to a need for some serious therapy, but who has time? Besides, I’d rather run.

I have to say that when it comes to running, body size doesn’t always matter. Plenty of times at races, I’ve been passed by runners who are much “larger” than me. When women pass men, we say the guy's been “chicked”. Can you think of any term for being passed by a fat runner?   Oh, that’s dangerous territory… terms come to mind, sure, but none that I’d want to be called, so I will pass on that!  But isn’t it great that lots of large people are out there?  That’s one reason I love running so much, because it’s the only sport in which people of all shapes and sizes can literally compete on the same field (and roads), and at the same time, as the elites. How cool is that?

Your story about the bike ride/date and the runaway donkeys just made me roar. Do you still have donkeys? And how long do you wait before you tell a guy you’re dating that you have the donkeys. Is it always a deal breaker?    Yes, I still have two donkeys, because (again) I’m fiercely loyal like that. I have suffered so much loss over the past few years that I am super-glued to everyone and everything that is still with me.  I don’t believe either people or animals are disposable, no matter how much trouble they may be.  As for deal-breakers, I wouldn't waste time even having coffee with a man who doesn't love animals.

Do you have any suggestions for running related books we should read this year? Preferably humorous… --  well, anything by  George Sheehan, of course!  Even though he was a doctor and a fierce competitor, he was really funny, and humor is laced through all his books.   A fun book I read last year was “The Lola Papers: Marathons, Misadventures and How I Became a Serious Runner” by Amy Marxkors; I’d recommend that.  And I would recommend  Dimity McDowell and Sarah Bowen Shea’s  “Tales from Another Mother Runner” (subtitled: A Collection from Badass Mother Runners), which just came out, even if I didn’t have an essay included!

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Here's the linkup badge for your post/book review: 

Be sure to link back to the blog and visit the other posts to see what others have to say. 

If you want to get a jump on the next book, it's 4:09:43 by Hal Higdon. I picked this one in anticipation of the Boston Marathon. And following that will be the newest release from our favorite mother runners, Dimity and Sarah. 

So many books, so little time.....

Motivation!

When everything hits the proverbial fan, it takes every ounce of resolve I have to lace up my running shoes, head out the door and go for a run. I actually consider just going back to bed and pulling the covers up over my head. Have you ever felt like that? It's a slippery slope towards depression, and I don't want to go there. After all, that's one of the reasons I started running 20 plus years ago. And that in and of itself is my biggest motivator to get out the door.

What else do I do to motivate myself to run?

If you don't want to race or if you need more goals, you can stay accountable by signing up for a virtual race or group. In 2015, I signed up with Run This Year. While no longer in operation, the goal of Run This Year was accountability. I always have a loose goal of running 100 miles per month, and I set a goal to run 2015 km in 2015 (which translates to 1251 miles. The organizers,had Instagram contests to keep participants motivated. They also encouraged participants to print out bibs every 100 miles and post a picture to the website. At the end of the year, I met my goal. What a great feeling!

Reading about running can be motivating! Shameless plug: as you may or may not know, I'm hosting a running book club right here on the blog! This is a great chance to read books that you might never have considered picking up! You can read more about the book club here. And if you are one of those people who don't read books--I don't understand you but I know you're out there--you can read magazines about running. There's a ton of websites with articles about running. And I know a few awesome blogs about running. Obviously, you do too....

Connect with other runners via social media. I cannot say enough how much having my virtual running friends helped me train for a successful Chicago Marathon last fall. It takes a village to train a runner, apparently. Just ask Jenny Hadfield! If you are a social runner, find a running group in your community. Be with your people. They get you and if your mojo is flagging, they can help you find it. I get by with a little help from my friends.

Adopt a mantra. I continue to use my "I can and I will" mantra to not only get me through my training but also through my mama drama. It sounds corny, but it really works. Music gets me moving too, and I've written plenty about how listening to motivating lyrics can really push me through a tough run. Some of my friends listen to podcasts.

I feel like the Yeti these days!

While it might seem superficial to some, having cute (or if you're a guy, cool) running clothes really is a great pick me up. You don't have to spend a lot of money to get some fun things to wear. TJMaxx and Marshall's is a great source of inexpensive, name brand gear. Target's C9 brand is high quality and fashion forward. Old Navy is another great source for cute running clothes. There are plenty of other options, but as they say, you don't have to spend a lot to look good. Sometimes just buying a few new items is enough to perk up even the most depressed winter runner. Clearly, though, I've been following this advice a little too closely. But do you want to be that runner wearing inappropriate clothing? I didn't think so.

How do you find your mojo?