Like a Boss: Recovery Week

Last Sunday I ran the Humana Rock 'n' Roll Chicago Half Marathon and have been on a high ever since. No, I didn't PR, unless you want to call it an RA PR. But it was just one of those race experiences I'll never forget. By now, you'd think I'd have both my feet firmly on the ground. After all, I had to go back to work the next day.

Here I am, one week later, still feeling like a champion. I spent the week recovering from my race but I have not been sitting on the sofa, eating chocolates and drinking wine. There has been some of that of course, but my recovery week has been nothing short of epic...

Summer's Got Me Like....

Ah, summer! It's the time of year we long for during those cold, snowy winter days. The days are long, but here in the Midwest, the season is short. It feels like every free minute is packed as we try to squeeze in as much outdoor time as possible.

This weekend was no exception as I wrapped up my work week on Wednesday night and readied for a full three day extravaganza!

Work Hard, Play Hard

Summertime and the living's easy. Right?

This year, not so much. Instead of feeling relaxed, I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed this summer as we try to pack in as much fun as we can in the limited free time on the calendar. Taking that leave of absence earlier this year left me with little vacation time. I've got a few long weekends and I plan to make the most of them.

The theme for this summer seems to be: work hard, play hard. 

The DNS: There's a First Time for Everything

Yesterday was the day I was supposed to run marathon #5, Grandma's Marathon. I signed up for Grandma's right around the time I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. Loaded up with steroids at the time, I was feeling good and figured I could go ahead with my plans to run this spring race in the north woods of Minnesota. Heck, I wasn't going to let this disease get the best of me! I was going to show RA just who was in charge.

Right on! RA had other plans for me. While I continued to run through the spring, my endurance continued to decline. I was DNFing all my runs--I was struggling to even run a mile-- and frustrated with myself, I made the decision to discontinue my training and not run Grandma's.

It was not an easy decision but it felt like the right thing to do. Immediately after canceling my plans to run the race, I felt as if a weight was lifted off my shoulders. Instead of training for a marathon, I shifted my focus to the May race I also had signed up for, the Door County Half Marathon. I began doing run/walk intervals with success and satisfaction. Running became enjoyable again. I've never been good at listening to my body, but I was having no regrets about my plans to DNS for the first time ever.

I Get To Run

I do. I get to run. Never before has it been such a big deal to me. As runners, I think we take it for granted that we can run. Even when we are injured, we know that eventually, we'll be back on the road. We might not be happy to be sidelined, but there's always the expectation that there will be many miles ahead for us.

Even though I've been feeling pretty good, I get little reminders all the time that I have a beast inside me, that I'm not really the boss of me. Often it's my knees. Going downstairs is more of a challenge these days. They aren't painful very often, but they are stiff. The first mile of a run is always a liar now while I start slowly to loosen up my joints. My feet hurt almost all the time. My big toes keep me in good alignment as I run because if I land wrong, they send me a very strong signal to straighten up and fly right.

Still, I get to run. I've always been grateful to be a runner but never as much as I am now. I had always hoped to be able to run into old age. While I still hope for that, realistically I know that my running days are probably finite.

Stronger Every Day!

While nothing exciting or earth-shattering happened this week, what stood out to me the most is how much I am feeling like myself again. Even the heat can't stop me!

I am beyond thrilled with how my fitness is returning. I'm continuing to feel good again. I had several days this week where I remarked to my husband that if I didn't know I had RA, I wouldn't know I had it. Modern medicine and good nutrition are the best combination.

Hitting the Reset Button

This was the week that I got my life back on track, or at least tried to! It was all about trying to reset my equilibrium. I'm ready to find my new normal. My assessment? I think it was a good start.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

Hi, everyone! Welcome to the Weekly Wrap. No, you aren't at the wrong blog. Holly and Tricia, who normally host the Weekly Wrap, are taking a little bit of a break from hosting duties. While they take a little time off, the Weekly Wrap will be rotating among guest hosts. This week, I'm your guest host and if this is your first time visiting my blog, welcome and I hope it won't be your last! If you are interested in being a guest host for the Weekly Wrap, please let Tricia or Holly know and they will fill you in on the details.

If you are new to the Weekly Wrap, the rules are here. Please comment on as many blogs as you can. Don't forget to comment on the guest host's blog and link back to them too! My motto over here is "sharing is caring". Don't just drop a link and leave. You might find a few new blogs or even make some new friends! Come back during the week to check out some of the later links, too!

So how was the week?

Spring in Chicago is not for wimpy. The standing joke here is "if you don't like the weather, wait and it will change". We also joke that we can experience all 4 seasons in one day. As a lifelong resident and longtime runner, I've learned to be prepared for anything. We went from summer to winter this week. I'm not exaggerating. It was 85 on Wednesday and 45 on Thursday. I use this as an excuse to have an expansive running wardrobe. 

I filled every bit of my last week before I go back to work to wrap up some loose ends. It was busy and productive, but that's a good sign, right? It means that I'm heading in the right direction!

The No Pressure, No Marathon Training Plan

Another week of "no marathon training" complete! It's a strange feeling, training for a marathon that I most likely won't run. Usually, with marathon training, there's a sense of urgency-- to hit all your miles, to complete speed work or hill repeats with even splits, and to ensure that your recovery is on point. Heck, on this plan if I don't feel like doing a run or going the distance prescribed, it's no big deal.

But no pressure doesn't mean skipping out on a workout entirely. My motto is to do what I can. Finishing is winning, right? That includes my workouts. This week, the wind has been howling and the temperatures are cold. While there are days where it's hard to motivate myself to get moving, I force myself to move. To not move is to lose fitness and mobility. As a benefit of staying on track, I'm starting to rediscover some endurance. Recovery is becoming easier as well. Either my body is adjusting to my new training style or my disease is starting to relent.

Doing the Opposite

It was a quiet week for me. I was still processing all the "well-meaning" but pointed advice my family gave me when we got together last Sunday. While I understand their concerns, everyone was telling me what I should and shouldn't be doing. Suddenly, everyone in my world has become an expert on rheumatoid arthritis. Some of the things people are telling me are quite frightening.

Just because something happened to your aunt, friend, cousin, etc. with RA doesn't mean it's going to happen to me. Correlation does not imply causation. With regards to running and RA, running does not hurt your knees. Running will not make rheumatoid arthritis worse. Rheumatoid arthritis will tell you when you can't run or you have run enough. Trust me on this one. As someone who is used to pushing through the pain of running, this has been the toughest lesson for me to learn. I have no choice but to listen to my body to guide me through my daily activities. While in the past, I could push through a tough run without stopping, my body won't let me do that right now. So I'm figuring out ways to safely and comfortably make it work.

Keeping On....

Did you hear that Lady Gaga has rheumatoid arthritis? Sure enough, she "came out" this week, giving an explanation for the "chronic hip pain" she's suffered from for many years. To most of you reading this blog, Lady Gaga's big reveal probably means nothing to you. But for me, as I continue to work on integrating my diagnosis into my self-image, this news was fairly empowering. Even though I'm not a Lady Gaga fan, I think it's always a good thing when a celebrity puts a face on an illness.

Actually, there was a lot of empowerment for me this week and it came from all over. Some from within, which is always nice, but once again, I realized how much support I have around me. So in spite of a gray, wet, cold return to Chicago after a week in sunny Florida, I had a good week. It really was the perfect kickoff to training for my upcoming Grandma's Marathon in June.

Changes in Latitude, Changes in Attitude

Greetings from Illinois. As I write this, I'm in my running gear, waiting for the rain to stop so I can go outside and run. It's a cold rain--the 45 degree temperatures are a shock to my system. It doesn't take long to get acclimated to the warmth. The cold is a different story.

Why can't we all live at the beach?

After a week in the sunshine and tropical warmth of Florida, it's always tough to come back to real life. I'm so grateful I was able to get away. There's nothing like a dose of Vitamin Sea to heal both body and mind. While I was happy to be away from the daily grind, I have to admit that I missed my family and my pup.

Being a goal oriented gal, I did have one goal for this week and that was to relax. Regular readers know that I've been struggling with my newish diagnosis of RA. Along with the physical symptoms, I've been on an emotional rollercoaster as I adjust to all that accompanies a chronic illness.

If only life could always be as easy as it is at the beach. Indulge me as I recap my week away.

Runfessions: March

Ooops.

Last night as I was wrapping up my monthly runfessions, I had the realization this is not the last Friday of the month. Apparently, March has 31 days. I runfess that I have completely lost track of time. Isn't that what you are supposed to do when you're on vacation?

With no other post in the works, I decided to go ahead and publish this one. Let's head into the runfessional and see what other runfessions I have to share. It's been a long month.

I am....

This week in yoga class, the instructor started by talking about labels. She asked all of us to remove the labels that others have given us as well as the labels we give ourselves. She introduced a Sanskrit mantra: "so hum", which loosely translated into English means "I am". We did some pranayama (breathing), using the mantra "so hum".

You know I love a good mantra and "so hum", or I am, is as good a mantra as they come. Repetitive use of a mantra helps quiet the mind by giving the user a focus. The mantra "so hum" has a much deeper meaning, but for the purposes of this class and this post, I chose to focus on the "I am", letting go of negative labels and focusing on seeing myself in a positive light.

I am _________.

My mind wandered, as it often does during quiet meditation. While I breathed and so hummed to myself, I thought about how I see myself and how others see me. I could think of a few not so flattering ways people might see me as well as some not so positive ways I view myself. Taking a more positive viewpoint, I so hummed strength.

I would say that I see myself as strong. I bet most people would say that is how they see me too.

I am strong.

The Power of Positive Thinking

I woke up pain-free this morning!

Now as you runners know, "pain-free" is a relative term. But considering that I spent this week recovering from my recent flare of rheumatoid arthritis, I'd say that today I am 99% pain-free. I took a couple days off work to rest, recover, and process the changes in my treatment plan. I saw my rheumatologist on Monday. While I am going to continue on the same regimen I've been on for a while, including the steroids and methotrexate injections, she also started me on Humira.

The time off work gave me a lot of time to recover, but also to think. Once again, I am feeling overwhelmed. One step forward and two steps back. I have a stack of bills and medical statements to go through. I am worried about the cost of this new medication. I have a house that needs attention and a husband working 6 days/week. I have a marathon to train for. Oh, and I have a job that requires me to be healthy. It's all a bit much.

As the week went on, I started to feel much better, both physically and mentally. I made my workouts my priority. Worked on some blogging stuff. I enjoyed the sunshine. Hung out with the dog. Made dinner for my family.

And I focused on the positive.

Runfessions: February

Here we are again--it's the end of the month and that can only mean one thing. Yep, once again, it's time for Runfessions--that monthly clear the conscience and make things right in the universe again time.

Let's head into the runfessional, shall we?

Practicing Kindness

On Wednesday at yoga class, the instructor came around as we prepared for savasana, which for you non-yogis, is that final resting pose at the end of class. She asked if anyone needed some extra grounding. She walked around the room, distributing sandbags to people who asked. Without me saying a word, she placed a sandbag across my thighs. That extra pressure on my thighs helped me relax. Her thoughtfulness made me feel so good.

The theme for the class was Ahimsa, which we take to mean practicing kindness. The Sanskrit definition, which is non-violence, is much deeper. The instructor's simple act of kindness inspired me to write today's post to reflect back on acts of kindness I observed and practiced this week.

Trusting the Process: On and Off the Road

I turned a corner this week. I ran well, I held my balance poses in yoga, and I lifted 89% of my max doing deadlifts with Becky.

I am feeling good. If I didn't know I had rheumatoid arthritis, I wouldn't know I had it. Does that even make sense? As I continue to wean off the steroids, my aches and pains are barely noticeable. I have more energy. My mood is good. Most importantly, my sense of humor is returning!

Becky always says it and my rheumatologist said it too: Trust the Process.

The Group Run: It Was Time

Instead of life turning me upside down as it has been threatening to do for the last couple of months, I've taken charge. I'm making some pretty major changes in my diet, eating beets and kale and all kinds of foods I wouldn't have allowed past my lips just 2 months ago. I'm listening to more positive, upbeat music instead of the angry rock that has fueled my runs all these years.

This week I really pushed out of my running comfort zone and met up with a running friend and her tribe for a Saturday long run, which I hope was the first of many more to come. It was time.

When Steph asked me to join her and her friends for their Saturday long run, I didn't hesitate. Me, the runner who craves the solace of the long run? Who am I? I blame my boldness on the steroids I'm currently taking. Actually, I'm blaming everything on the steroids, but that's a topic for another blog post.

Cruise Control

After completing the lululemon/strava run challenge on Sunday, I dialed back my miles. It's nice to be "just" running again. Between some personal stress and our new president, I need my runs to help me sort things out. There is some prep work to do as I gear up for marathon training in March, but for now, I just get to run. I've got some mental fitness to work on and it's nice to have the freedom to do that.

No gears, no heart rate training, no goal paces. I've got it on cruise control.