This week, Sammy Jo and I sat down and had a candid discussion. A few weeks ago, she pushed me a little harder on a lift than I felt comfortable with. While I did say something at the time and she reduced the reps, she still had me lift the weight. I was upset that she wanted me to continue, but I didn't want to let her down. I left that session feeling sore and unsettled. Those feelings simmered. When I saw her the following week, I said something about it to her, but it didn't go well at all. After taking some time to think about it, I walked into this week's strength session, prepared to discuss it but also ready to call it quits if she wanted.
I explained how I felt about lifting something so heavy. I felt scared that I was going to hurt myself. I didn't want to disappoint her. I didn't want to disappoint myself. I felt like she thought I was a wimp for saying it was too heavy. And I apologized for not saying something at the time. Then it was her turn. She didn't hold back. Bottom line: she said she knew I could do the lift. She said she would be ok if I couldn't. She wants me to tell her how I'm feeling at the time. Most importantly, she said it's ok to fail on a lift. In fact, she told me she expected it on the one that scared me because she knew how heavy it was. She'd rather have me try and fail than not try at all. This, she said, is how to get stronger.
And isn't that the goal?
